Monday, 26 March 2012

Tough time for cancer parents

I catch myself on the verge of tears all the time with things that don't normally bother me, and that's on the 40mg of prozac!

One thing I will say is that we have had a horrific time. It's like at the moment, hospital downplay it so you don't feel like it's that serious. But the reality is DD has febrile neutropenia and pneumonia, 4 bags of blood, 1 bag of platelets, feels shite, keeps throwing up in spite of anti-sickness, backache and headache requiring codeine. It is pretty serious. I feel like a zombie at the moment, I'm so out of my head with lack of sleep. 

We are chugging through these experiences for months and months with our children. I'm surprised more cancer parents don't have total breakdowns when the coast is finally clear and you are allowed to focus on yourself again. It is a toxic situation: we are storing up untold amounts of stress. I keep dreaming about the time DD had to have cannulas in her feet because her arms were too bruised to take any more. It's shit. But you repress these experiences and don't deal with them because the next thing to worry about crops up before you get a chance. 

No comments:

Post a Comment